040715milokosami
07:14 AA: Sami knocks on Miloko's door. 07:15 TT: "who is it?" 07:16 AA: "It's Sami." 07:18 TT: "oh? w-what do you w-want?" 07:19 AA: "I wanted to apologize for earlier. And to give you kudos for how you handled it after I left." 07:20 TT: the door opens finally, "it's a-alright?" 07:22 AA: "It's really not. I've been acting like I could be a rock you guys could rest your backs against, and I crumbled so easily when it looked like no one trusted me anymore." 07:24 AA: "I just wanted to let you know that I'm not going to let it happen again. I'm going to be here even if no one else is with me. And you and all the others are always welcome to my guidance and protection if you want it." 07:24 TT: "w-well, e-even the t-toughest r-rocks c-crumble if t-they try to c-carry the w-weight of the w-world on t-their own?" 07:25 AA: "Yeah. I know. I just feel like it's the only thing I have to offer, sometimes." 07:26 TT: "y-you're s-smart? and you s-seem to h-have y-your h-head a-above w-water m-more t-than a-anyone e-else?" 07:28 AA: Sami blushes. "What? Really? You really think that?" 07:29 TT: "y-yeah?" 07:30 AA: "Thank you. I don't really feel like it most of the time though." 07:35 AA: "Especially now that Meouet's gone. I always saw her the way you're seeing me now, and now that she's our enemy....I'm scared. I don't think I'm on her level. And that's even setting aside the issue of whenever Jack drops his detente." 07:39 TT: "you d-don't h-have to be on a-anyone's l-level? y-you're not a-alone?" 07:40 AA: "Ever since the Thiago thing, I *feel* alone." 07:41 TT: "I'm h-here? a-aren't I?" 07:42 AA: "Yeah. And you're not the only one. Beau's been trying to rebuild my confidence like crazy. It's just hard. Even if I was manipulated into it, that blood is always going to be on my hands." 07:44 TT: "and it s-should be? you s-should n-never f-forget w-what h-happened? but you s-should n-never let the m-mistakes of the p-past d-dictate the f-future?" 07:44 AA: "Yeah. You're right." 07:46 AA: "Oh, and I heard you stood up for yourself and all the work we did together once I left, and managed to convince everyone to go with the teams we figured out together!" 07:48 TT: "it's not t-that h-hard? p-people f-feel bad for me? l-like t-they're a-afraid I'm g-going to b-break d-down if p-people say 'no'?" 07:49 AA: "You're sure that's it? What if it's that they actually respect you, Milly?" 07:49 AA: "Because those compliments you gave me earlier? They're true about you too. You've got your head screwed on tighter than any of the other rookies I've met." 07:50 TT: "t-thank you?" 07:53 TT: "oh, we d-decided to go to my w-world n-next? if you h-have any a-advice for me, I'd l-love to h-hear it?" 07:54 AA: "Specific advice is going to be hard to give without knowing your world. But let me see..." 07:55 TT: "it's the L-Land of E-Euphoria and D-Drums?" 07:55 TT: ((*drum)) 07:55 AA: "Yeah, but I don't know what the World Quest or anything is, or the situation on LOEAD, I mean." 07:56 AA: "But for starters, don't be afraid to put your foot down. The World Quest on your world is going to be about your personal growth, and that means that the decisions you make are the ones that really matter for accomplishing the world quest." 07:56 AA: "That doesn't mean not to listen to others, but it does mean that you're the one who has to make the decisions." 07:57 TT: "so b-basically, be a g-good l-leader?" 07:57 AA: "Right." 07:57 AA: "Secondly, try to get a feel for the culture of your Consorts before you act too rashly around them. I announced I was the Witch to mine and almost got hanged for it." 07:58 AA: "I really should've known better, but their leader was manipulating me with guilt." 07:58 AA: "I was still in mourning over Beau at the time, and he knew just how to make me feel like she died because of me." 07:59 TT: "aww? t-that's a m-mean t-thing to do?" 07:59 AA: "Yeah. That's another thing, though. The challenges you face on this world are probably going to be specifically designed to hit you in your weak points." 08:00 AA: "It sounds cruel, but I think the goal is to make you either have to grow and overcome those weaknesses, or wipe you out before those weaknesses can be used against you elsewhere." 08:00 AA: "Which is still kind of cruel, but at least it's....I don't know, fair-ish." 08:01 TT: "you m-mean l-like how the d-dogs p-preyed u-upon L-Lily's i-impulsive n-nature?" 08:01 AA: "Yeah, exactly." 08:01 AA: "Or the Turkey preyed on my guilt and my tender heart." 08:02 TT: "so, be r-ready for a-anything, in my c-case?" 08:02 AA: "Yeah." 08:02 AA: "Leaning on your friends to get past those moments isn't just okay, it's probably necessary." 08:02 AA: "So if you need any moral support, don't be afraid to call me." 08:02 AA: "But you'll have Darmok there, too, right?" 08:02 TT: "y-yeah?" 08:02 TT: "h-hopefully?" 08:03 AA: "And your brother." 08:03 AA: Sami sighs. "Yeah." 08:04 AA: "I hope you understand, Milly--I didn't keep that from you because I didn't think you were strong enough to handle it. I kept it from you because I didn't want you to HAVE to handle it yet. I thought it would be less painful in the long run for you if it came out of left field." 08:04 TT: "so you w-wanted his d-death to c-compromise two of our n-number?" 08:05 AA: "No. But do you really think it's not going to compromise you now that you know about it?" 08:05 AA: "I know I'm not sure it's not going to compromise me." 08:06 TT: "no? but now I can at l-least try and be r-ready for w-when it h-happens?" 08:06 AA: Sami nods. "Then I'm sorry I didn't tell you." 08:07 TT: "it's a-alright? I u-understand you did w-what you t-thought was b-best?" 08:07 AA: "Yeah. I tried to think how I would've felt if I had known I was going to lose Beau. And I didn't want you to go through it." 08:08 AA: "But you're right....I would've been completely out of action if we were still doing worlds after LOSAR." 08:09 AA: "I barely left my room for three months. Maybe I wouldn't have been hit so hard if it hadn't been a surprise. Maybe I wouldn't have made that deal with the Horrorterrors..." 08:09 TT: "at l-least we w-won't be a-alone w-when it h-happens?" 08:10 TT: "do you r-regret y-your d-decision?" 08:11 AA: "I don't know. I wouldn't make the same decision again if it happened to me now, knowing what I know. But I love Beau, and all the time I've had with him. So I can't really regret it in that sense..." 08:11 AA: "...but if I hadn't made that decision, Jack wouldn't be here now." 08:12 AA: "If he ever decides to go back to his old ways, a lot of people are going to suffer because of my decision." 08:12 AA: "I didn't know that at the time. I don't think even the Sami I was then would've agreed to it if she had known. But I know the Sami that I am now couldn't do that to the rest of you." 08:14 TT: "but if you h-hadn't m-made the d-decision you w-wouldn't be h-here t-talking to me?" 08:14 AA: "What do you mean?" 08:14 TT: "it'd be a d-different S-Sami?" 08:14 AA: "Oh. Yeah, that's true." 08:15 AA: "Without Beau, I don't know what I would've become." 08:15 AA: "I was probably headed down a dark road." 08:15 AA: "Who knows--maybe that's the real identity of Ghost Sami. The Sami from the timeline where she didn't bring back Beau." 08:16 TT: "p-perhaps?" 08:20 TT: "l-listen, if you s-still w-want to do t-this l-leader t-thing? I'll d-defer to y-your e-experience?" 08:22 AA: "I'm going to be here, providing leadership as much as I can. But I don't expect anyone to follow me just because I've declared myself leader. I'll be here for anyone who chooses to be behind me, and I'll protect anyone who welcomes my protection." 08:24 TT: "t-then I c-choose to d-defer to y-your s-superior k-knowledge a-about the g-game?" 08:26 AA: Sami smiles. "Then welcome aboard. Feel free to come to me with any questions you have about SBURB or Paradox Space in general. I've studied it all extensively." 08:27 AA: "I don't have any orders or anything though. Just do your best on LOEAD, and try to let yourself be the best Miloko you can be." 08:28 TT: "a-alright? and I'll see if I c-can't r-restore the o-other's f-faith in you?" 08:29 AA: "I appreciate it. But don't push yourself too hard on that front. I think it's just going to take time. And some of them might never have faith in me again." 08:29 AA: "But first and foremost I have to be someone worth having faith in again." 08:29 AA: "So I'm going to spend this time on the Reserve team learning to be that." 08:30 TT: "g-good?" 08:32 TT: "c-cause you h-have to be at D-Darmok and my w-wedding? and I d-don't w-want you to s-skip out b-because you t-think e-everyone w-will h-hate you for s-showing up and r-ruining the e-event?" 08:34 AA: Sami smiles. "I'll be there for sure. Heck, I'll even officiate if you want." 08:36 TT: "m-maybe? w-we've s-still got s-some p-planning to do f-first? and it w-won't be u-until a-after t-these n-next w-worlds?" 08:37 AA: "Yeah, that's fine. Plus I'll understand if you would prefer to have your sister or brother do it." 08:42 TT: "a-actually, I t-think I h-have o-other jobs for t-them?" 08:42 AA: "Well, it's your special day. So whatever you think will be best." 08:45 TT: "I m-mean, I'll p-probably n-need my s-sister to k-keep me c-calm b-before the c-ceremony? so y-yeah, you can o-officiate?" 08:46 TT: "j-just m-make s-sure you h-have s-something n-nice to w-wear?" 08:50 AA: "Oh, yeah, I don't know if I've worn anything but my God Tier pajamas in years. I'll alchemize something especially for the ceremony." 08:51 AA: "We can do it when we make your dress." 08:52 TT: "t-that's t-true? and it d-doesn't h-have to be too f-flashy? j-just n-nothing c-covered in p-paint or a-anything? s-something r-respectable?" 08:53 AA: "Yeah. I've never been one for flashy anyway. And it just wouldn't do to take attention away from the bride." 08:54 TT: "p-please do?" 08:57 AA: "Maybe just a simple black skirt and a dress shirt. Even if that sounds more like something Beau would wear than me." 08:59 TT: "are you g-going to try and c-coorinate o-outfits w-with him?" 09:01 AA: "Hadn't really thought about it. I guess it makes sense to. Were you wanting him to be part of the ceremony, too?" 09:02 TT: "why w-wouldn't he be?" 09:03 AA: "I just wasn't sure. I know the whole ectobiology situation is weird. Especially with the alternate universe thing making things weirder. I'm glad you feel that way though. I know he'll love to be part of it." 09:04 TT: "w-well I m-mean, Q-Queen B-Beau was my r-role m-model g-growing up? so I do k-kind of see him as a s-surrogate p-parent?" 09:04 AA: "I know he sees you like a daughter. So I'm glad you feel the same way about him." 09:05 AA: "I mean....in reverse though." 09:05 AA: "It would be weird if you saw him as your daughter." 09:06 TT: "y-yeah?" Miloko chuckles, "I'm not t-that m-messed up inthe h-head?" 09:14 AA: "Man, given how convoluted this dumb game is, I wouldn't be surprised if we *were* both ancestors and descendents of one another at this point. 09:15 TT: "how w-would t-that e-even w-work?" 09:16 TT: "I m-mean, a lot of us are of m-mixed r-race?" 09:16 AA: "I don't know, weird time shit." 09:19 TT: "I'm g-going to s-stop t-thinking a-about it? one c-crisis of f-faith is m-more t-than e-enough for me?" 09:30 AA: "Yeah, I know what you mean. I was mostly joking anyway." 09:40 TT: "y-yeah? t-this g-game is all k-kind of m-messed up? i-isn't it?" 10:05 TT: ((AA Please)) 10:07 AA: (( wasn't really sure how to respond to that, sorry )) 10:08 AA: "Yeah, it is. In more ways than you can know. I've read histories of a bunch of sessions now. All pretty vague stuff though. Libby didn't give me access to her own logs." 10:10 TT: "and t-those are out of our r-reach c-currently?" 10:11 TT: "s-since t-there was a m-mutiny?" 10:11 AA: "Yeah. I imagine she's got digital copies--Twinks are all about digital stuff. But the books themselves are in Meouet's control right now." 10:12 AA: "Oh god. Just imagining the stuff she has access to....there are books about how to do all sorts of things that I would be scared of one of our enemies having." 10:13 TT: "do you t-think w-what A-Acenia's mom s-said was t-true?" 10:13 AA: "The power to control dreambubbles, I wouldn't be surprised if the secret of echoes was up there somewhere....heck, my eldritch brush techniques weren't even in the restricted area." 10:13 AA: "Which part? She said a bunch of things." 10:13 TT: "t-that I'd n-never be c-close to a m-match for her, u-unless I c-cheated?" 10:17 AA: "It's dangerous to disregard Scarlet entirely, but it's also not always wise to take her at her word." 10:17 AA: "That said, Scarlet's a Rage player, and has more experience at it than either of you." 10:18 AA: "Meouet is clever, and patient, and good at manipulation. And now she has access to Libby's treasure trove of artifacts and knowledge." 10:19 AA: "She's definitely dangerous. I refuse to believe you'll 'never' be close to a match for her without cheating, but I wouldn't rely on your title pushing you above her either." 10:20 TT: "I n-never p-planned on it?" 10:21 TT: "if a-anything, my t-title has m-made it m-more d-difficult for me?" 10:22 AA: "But also keep in mind--Scarlet wanted Rilset and Acenia on the same team." 10:23 AA: "And Scarlet would not be afraid to say something untrue to get her way." 10:23 AA: "Even if it put the rest of us in danger." 10:23 TT: "a-alright?" 10:23 AA: "Whether or not you are a match for Meouet, I am sure that your growth is important to our success, and the sooner the better." 10:24 AA: "Even if the only thing you can do against her is reduce the severity of her control over us, it'll still be one of the most useful things any of us can do against her." 10:25 TT: "y-yeah, p-plus my g-growth m-might h-help the o-other M-Muses f-find s-some m-more d-direction of how to use t-their p-powers?" 10:27 TT: "I m-mean, if any of t-them are new p-players b-besides L-Lily and m-myself?" Miloko adds quickly 10:27 AA: "Muses? Oh, right. I guess there are two more we don't know about yet." 10:27 AA: "Or don't know the identities of rather." 10:28 TT: "err, y-yeah, two?" 10:28 AA: "I think Libby does, but she hasn't told me if so." 10:28 AA: "Yeah. Rilset's Muse and Jack's Muse." 10:28 AA: "Plus you and Lily." 10:28 TT: "y-yeah, t-there are t-totally two t-that we d-don't k-know of?" 10:29 AA: Sami narrows her eyes suspiciously at Miloko. 10:29 AA: "That's an....awkward way of saying that." 10:29 AA: "Do you know something?" 10:30 TT: "m-maybe?" Miloko looks at the ground, ashamed 10:31 AA: "...are you not telling me because you're afraid I'll....do something to her, Milly?" 10:33 TT: "no, s-she's a v-very n-nice g-girl and I d-don't t-think s-she'd be the t-type to a-abuse her p-powers? but she s-seemed d-down w-when I f-figured it out, so I p-promised her I w-wouldn't t-tell?" 10:33 AA: "I see." 10:33 AA: Sami sighs. 10:33 AA: "Okay. Then I won't push you on it." 10:34 AA: "And I won't ask you to convince her she can trust me if she wants to tell me herself." 10:34 AA: "Because I know that would be difficult to pull off right now." 10:35 AA: "But I'd really appreciate it if you could look out for her, and help her grow as a Muse. It sounds like you might already be planning that, from the way you were talking earlier." 10:35 TT: "I am?" 10:35 TT: "and t-thank you for not p-pushing?" 10:35 AA: "No problem. I'm not sure I could do anything to help her right now anyway." 10:36 AA: "Maybe if I still had access to Libby's library, I could look stuff up for her. But I guess if I'm looking up general Muse stuff I might be able to do that anyway." 10:37 AA: "I'll ask Libby if she's got any digital reference I can be studying while I'm on the Reserve team. And I can tell you and Lily whatever I can learn, and you can pass it on to this other girl." 10:37 TT: "o-okay?" 10:41 AA: "I would offer to look up Lord stuff, too, but I think Darmok probably has even more knowledgeable mentors than Libby giving him advice." 10:41 TT: "m-might not be a bad i-idea to l-look it up a-anyways? for e-everyone e-elses b-benefit?" 10:42 TT: "so we can be p-prepared in the e-event of f-fighting one?" 10:43 AA: "Fighting one again, you mean?" She chuckles ruefully. "But you're right. It's not like I won't have time." 10:44 TT: "s-speaking of, I s-should p-probably get r-ready to h-head out s-soon?" 10:45 AA: "Yeah. Good luck. And call me if you need anything." 10:45 TT: "I w-will? and d-don't s-spend too m-much t-time a-alone w-with f-father w-while I'm g-gone a-alright?" 10:45 TT: "y-you've s-still got w-work to do h-here?" 10:46 AA: "Hehe." She grins in an expression that SCREAMS "it's a fair cop, guv." 10:48 TT: "I'll t-take t-that as a no?" 10:49 AA: "No, no. I'll be good. Mostly." 10:51 TT: "hehehe, o-okay t-then, see ya l-later?" 10:51 AA: "Later." 10:51 AA: Sami leaves Miloko's room with a wave, and heads back down the cooridor. Category:Sami Category:Miloko